The absence of you…

I will never stop loving you. I am grateful for the love you gave...

What colour is your grief?

got to thinking about what colour my grief is and if I could label it. Has this ever been something you have thought of? I think it must be much like rating your pain on a numerical scale, helpful to some but mostly just an arbitrary number that doesn't quite ring true to anyone else but you.

The Beauty in the Breakdown…

The complexities of grieving during "holidays"

The dog days…

The grief has begun...

Why do you still do this?

The other day I was speaking to a class of pre-med students and one of them clearly did not have the same love for palliative or end of life care as I did. They pretty overtly made a face when I said I had chosen to go into palliative and end of life care and that is the only care area I really wanted to work in. It was really interesting I have to admit. I do not normally see such a visceral response to what I do.

It is not just a Scarf…

For my friends and loved ones out there who are grieving, I see you. Do the things you need to to get through each day. The world is ever better because you are in it and one day maybe someone will grieve your love and life so deeply they buy an onslaught of scarves to commemorate you in their grief. Let it live in you and learn to live with it and through it because the grief never goes away we just get better at dealing with it. As you all can see I am still a work in progress.

Monster of my Memories.

My grief rattles around, inside the depths of my soul, clanging against my bones, aches into my viscera. It permeates into everything I do and am. But you do not see it, you see a smile or a laugh, an outward expression of who I used to be. Beneath the pleasantries, my grief rolls around...

When birthdays are no longer something to celebrate…

Hello lovely mortals! It has been a tick. So much has changed but also in the same sense much has remained the same. I have been thinking of writing quite a bit lately but carving out any time for myself lately seems like an overwhelmingly large task. I have started back to school and between...

My wish for nursing week…

Hello lovely mortals, It has been quite a while since I last wrote. I frankly have been overwhelmed with grief, the pandemic, working in healthcare, trying to find some semblance of normalcy in the chaos. As I am too sure you also are in your own ways. This week is yet another nursing week. I...